Looking like shit

I BBMed Señorita just now:

  "I put more poo on my face.  This stuff is amazing."

The things that only your best friend would understand...
...

The (Second) Poo Story


So, my gloriously convenient eczema decided to break out under my lip recently.  I wasn't too worried because the last time that it did that, I found this cream that totally killed it in 2 days flat.  This time, it was oozy and cracked and gross for like, a week now.  Anytime it FELT like it was starting to get better, it would just go ahead and get gross a couple hours later.

Ugh.

So Señorita came over today on a totally unrelated matter, but I whined my heart out to her about it anyway--that my damn face would just not dry up and heal.  Being an RN, she stared at me and thought about it.

  "Do you want to try some of that iodosorb paste we put on Malcolm's foot?"

Sure, if she thought it'd help.  A while ago, Malcolm had a wound on his foot that was also having a hard time scabbing over and healing because it was just so wet.  Señorita had brought this stuff for him that I'd known he'd been putting on his foot that healed him up good and quick, but I'd never really paid much attention.

So, sterile gauze, saline, and paste in hand, she tended to me.  She checked me out and cleaned me up first, and then out came the paste.

  "That's what the paste looks like?"

Squeezed out of the tube onto a little square of gauze, the paste looked like a little squirt of baby poo.

Yup.  That's what it looked like and that's what she smeared on my face.  Okay, so I had shitty paste smeared on my face.  How long should this stay on for?

  "Let's try it for at least 20 minutes."

As so we carried on.  We chatted, had our coffee/shake, shared stories, searched the web, touched up the poo when it started to slide out of place from under my lip, checked out dating profiles, played with the cat.

Before she left for the day and I went to get ready to leave the house for a meeting, Señorita was kind enough to clean me up.

  "Yeah, I don't think this is going to stain too badly..."

STAIN?!  I wish I'd had a picture of the moment she realized that she forgot this might stain my skin a bit.  Talk about an "oh shit..." moment, while she was dabbing at my face with saline.  Regardless, it didn't stain my skin (too badly) and according to her professional opinion, it had helped.  For me, the result wasn't apparent until 3 hours later when I checked myself out again at home.

It worked.

My skin was still a little cracked and dry, but it definitely wasn't gaping or oozing.  With a solid 2 hours before I had to be anywhere else, I decided to go for a second round of treatment...hence, the BBM message.

Hey, if you can't smear shit on your face at home in front of your best friend, when can you?

Here we go for the 350148794864647th time

Just telling you I'm re-doing my resume for the trillionth time for a position that I really want and think I can really get, but am just procrastinating on getting started because my toes are cold and it's not sunny outside.

Those things have nothing to do with resume writing.  I know that.  But still.

Not singing, but dancing

I generated a little more interest in my tweet last night than I thought I would have:

  "When it rains, it pours...but this time, I'm dancing in the rain."

Not that I expected everyone (or anyone) to know what I was referring to, but everyone liked it.  I guess there is a sort of romantically dreamy idea of dancing in the rain--if it's raining and yet you're still dancing, it's gotta be something good.
...

Regardless, dad emailed me to check out what was up.

Dad - So, what is so rejoicing to dance up a storm in the rain?

me - I was talking about getting work. I went from having NOTHING, to having a whole bunch of somethings. :)

Dad - I thought it may have been getting hired into a dream job or something. Well, I am sure that will happen too. Keep dancing!
...

I dance all the time, don't you worry, dad.  :)

I'm glad you came

I didn't apply to a single job today.  Instead, I spent 12 straight hours compiling and editing less than 2 minutes of video footage.

I loved it.

I really wish I could share it with you guys, but unfortunately the feature product is still in production and I can't release any information about it yet except that it's really cool.  And that I did the video for it.

As consolation, here's the song I may have used to go with the footage.

The write track

Three articles in four days.  I like this writing business.  Now if only it would pay the bills.

As you may or may not know, I've been appointed the Contributing Editor of the FPCO Magazine (which just recently graduated from being a newsletter), and the Managing Editor of What's Fab Magazine (an exclusively online publication).  Both publications have asked me to fill in as the Health and Fitness writer, probably because those are the least glamourous columns.  But that won't stop me!

When I can stop worry about bills so much (hopefully because that temp agency can find me some placements), I'd like to branch out and take my own photography to accompany the articles as well.  That's aiming for the moon, but it's still a shot I'd like to take.  Online resume/portfolio, look out!  We've got some updating to do!

I'm not afraid of you

Thursday, I walked into an interview and about halfway through I worked up the courage and told them they had a typo in their introduction instructions.  We then completed more paperwork and finished the interview at the end of which she told me:

   "You present very well."

Why thank you; I knew that.  Just kidding.  Not really, but...yeah.  I knew that.

A "very good" posting

I'm a "savvy" person looking to "roll up my sleeves" and work with "real people" with "charm" and "charisma" at a "reputable" firm where I'll be "more than just a number"!

People have jobs where they can publish postings like this and I'm the one that's under-qualified?

Sadly, I might still apply for this.

The answer is no

The story today is about whether or not you would give a future (or current, I guess) employer the login and password for your Facebook account. In the article by the Toronto Star, one man had the luxury to refuse--the other didn't. Heads up now: I may not have the luxury, but I would also refuse. It's just a bit too "off" of a request for me. Why don't they just ask for the keys to my house, car, and the PIN to my credit and debit cards? I mean, get it all out and over with right at the start?

I think that's the point for me: if it starts, where does it stop?

Most people probably still don't even share their passwords with their friends or family--how can it be expected that they'll share it with an interviewer that they've never met before that moment?  I can ALMOST see the question being a trick one--one to test your integrity or ability to keep confidential information secret.  But that's tricky.  And it wasn't the case.

The whole point of Facebook is to keep in touch with your friends, not to give your personal information to strangers.  Sure, there are professionals (I'm thinking of teachers, first and foremost) who censor their content and accessibility to their pages on a regular basis, but I'm not one of them.  As Malcolm will tell you (sometimes to his dismay), I don't believe that I should have to censor the things that are mine.  If they're mine and I have chosen to share them with you, you're more than welcome to share.  If I don't know you and I haven't shared with you, butt out.

Sharing

Instagram turns everyone into a professional photographer...even if they were one already.

Unfriended and not liked

Apparently sleep and I are not friends again.  While last time it was a break up between skin, sleep and I, this time it's just sleep and I that are no longer connecting.  I climbed into bed hours ago, and while I admittedly did 2 crossword puzzles before turning off the light, I have since been lying here, not even tossing or turning, waiting for sleep to sneak up on me, but alas, no luck.  Hell, it's bad enough that I decided to give up on trying for a second to post about it.

I thought it was because perhaps I messed up my sleeping schedule a few nights ago by finding myself addicted to playing Scramble on the iTouch.  But it's been a few nights since then and it's been the same routine every night: go to bed, stare at the backs of my eyelids for hours (I can tell it's hours because I can hear my digital watch chime them as they go by), hate myself for not sleeping, fall asleep somewhere just before dawn.

I used to defy sleeping.  I still do sometimes, but not lately, and yet this is what I get anyway.  The worst is when I'm trying to sleep and then...the birds.  When I can hear the birds starting to wake, I know I'm f'ed.  Oop...there goes one now.  Eff.

The pay off

It's Thursday.  I haven't sent out a single resume yet this week because I've been determined not to let my uncle down if I were to use him as a reference and have been doing and re-doing my resume all week, not to mention working on my online presence (LinkedIn, Twitter, and online resume) as well.  After 4 grueling days and a few grueling nights (the most grueling one being last night with TCHC bullying me to do better), I sent yet another version to my uncle for review.  Less than 20 minutes later, I had a response.

   "This is much more interesting to read."

It was one of the best things I'd heard all week.

An Excel-erated suggestion

Ehbaba is the person I know who loves MS Excel like no other.  She's a total pro, can make amazing things happen with Excel, AND she gets excited when things work, when she gets to run reports to produce charts or graphs, when she gets to use an obscure function, or even when I learn how to use a new one.  Being such a professional, I had sought some advice from her with regards to resumes in an attempt to get mine up to par on paper and online.   With that in the back of your mind...
__________

From:  ehbaba
To:  melody
Subject:  re: Resume Advice?

[...]  I like seeing led/managed/developed more than arranged/kept/verified.  I like the summary bit at the top of your resume.  It helped me decide on whether or not to read the rest of it.  I think I'll take that idea off you. :)

__________

From:  ehbaba
To: melody
Subject:  random suggestion

Since you're going for creative jobs and your resume is online, why not make it "fun" visually?  Use charts, pictures, whatever!

__________

From:  melody
To:  ehbaba
Subject: re: random suggestion


You are the ONLY PERSON in the WORLD who would suggest putting charts on my resume to make it look "fun."

LoL

__________

From:  ehbaba
To:  mel
Subject:  RE: re:  random suggestion

and when i say charts, i mean the most fun kind - pictographs!

_________

Of course she would.

The skinny on funny things at night

Dimps and I were chatting tonight.  It got to the point where we LoL'd so much that I felt I'd overdone the acronym and tried to refrain at least a few exchanges without it.  Dimps didn't feel the same.

dimps - Nope just offloaded
  LOLOLOLOLOLOL
  Too Mich?
  Much?
  :)

me - ROTFLMAS
  oops.

dimps - Mmm hmm.

me - that "S" shoudl have been an "O"
  hahahaha not that anyone ever actually reads those acronyms for accuracy

dimps - I know. But I'm wondering what the "s" could be instead

me - Rolling On The Floor Laughing My Ass Skinny
  duh
  That's why my ass is so flat - I laugh way too much while rolling on the floor.

dimps - That's amazing.

me - :)  Thanks.  I think I will post that

dimps - Hahaha.  The best material is when ur tired...

me - like the time we had you with a fork in your side and a pen in your eye?

dimps - Exactly like that.
  That was great.

me - It was.
  I remember ROTFLMAS
  that's right...skinny

dimps - Hot off the press, best acronym ever.

Caution: girls at play

I think I just spent the last 12 hours drinking wine and playing video games with Señorita--it was spectacular.  She picked me up from home (giving me a much needed reprieve from staring blankly at my resume for the 3rd day in a row), took me out to buy wine and munchies, and then plopped me down on her couch to be wined and have the munchies while playing 2-player Little Big Planet on her giant TV.

Perfect.  As always, there were some gems from our conversation.

   "Hang on, I need some sausage in me first!  OOooOOOOooh, that's what SHE said!"  (No, the grammar's correct - one person said it all.)

   "I love that we're grown-ass women playing video games and that you're the bride and I'm the dirty señorita."

It's just what I needed.  And apparently what she needed too.  And if that means that we need to consume 3 litres of wine while playing video games and eating junk once in a while, then I'm okay with that.

Second check

Online resume up and running.  It's decent, but as stated before, it's still "a little bland."  But now that it's up and running I have all the more motivation to fix it up before anyone sees it while it still puts you to sleep.

First check off the list

Completed and updated my LinkedIn profile.  Right back to the beginning!  Oh man, I forgot about half the things I've done in my life, career-wise.  But, it's all there, in your face.  I can now click on my profile page and not have to hang my head in shame about it.

In your face.

"It's a little bland."

I just want to bury my head in my hands and weep.  I got the best advice and most constructively critical advice about my resume to date and to take it into consideration, regardless of how gently the words were couched, means that I suck and I have to redo it.

I am so tired of looking at my own resume.  But, here I go--steeled to the task, I will carry on.

It has come to this

I'm sitting here at home on the I-don't-know-what-number Monday since we've returned from the other side of the globe and am yet again, as all the previous Mondays (except for, like, 1), applying for jobs.  I got hungry, so I made myself lunch:  Kraft Dinner...but the Costco brand because I can't afford the real stuff.  And to save myself time, I am eating straight out of the pot.  With the big-ass wooden spoon I used to make it.

On the other hand, to change things up, today is going to be online resume day.  Yay!  Creativity!

Rejection revisited

I just received another rejection email from a different company that I applied to awhile ago.  I wish someone could inform that other chick that this is the way it's done.

Dear Candidate,

Please accept our appreciation for your interest in Tactful-and-Professional Company and thank you for your recent application.

Your qualifications are impressive and no doubt a strong reflection of the knowledge and experience you would bring to any organization. However at this point in time, we are proceeding with a couple of other candidates that more closely meet our requirements.

Your profile will continue to reside in our database. We encourage you to continue visiting our website for new opportunities.

Thank you again for your interest in Tactful-and-Professional Company and best of luck in your future endeavours.

Sure it's another rejection - but I'm embracing my persistence and not letting anything get me down.

I'll give you an experience

I got a rejection email from a recruiter that I applied to for an entry level position of a sort that I'd held for quite some time in the past.

Thank you for your resume. I did have a look and you do not process the skills or experience that my client is looking for.

I wanted to go to her office and punch her in the face.

She said "process" instead of "possess" and I think she was mad that I found out who she was and emailed and addressed her directly instead of the usual generic "to whom it may concern." She didn't have to be so condescending about it. A simple: "thank you for your application but we have decided to go with another more qualified candidate this time." A non-rejection rejection.

Great. Now I can't share this blog as a writing sample for potential jobs anymore.

Song of the Moment: "We are Young" - F. U. N.

Give me a second I need to get my story straight
My friends are in the bathroom getting higher than the empire state
My lover she's waiting for me just across the bar
My seats been taken by some sunglasses asking 'bout a scar

And I know I gave it to you months ago
I know you're trying to forget
But between the drinks and subtle things
The holes in my apologies
You know I'm trying hard to take it back

So if by the time the bar closes
And you feel like falling down
I'll carry you home

Tonight
We are young
So let's set the world on fire
We can burn brighter than the sun

Tonight
We are young
So let's set the world on fire
We can burn brighter than the sun

Now I know that I'm not all that you got
I guess that I just thought maybe we could find a ways to fall apart
But our friends in back
So let's raise a toast
'Cause I found someone to carry me home

Tonight
We are young
So let's set the world on fire
We can burn brighter than the sun

Tonight
We are young
So let's set the world on fire
We can burn brighter than the sun

Carry me home tonight
Just carry me home tonight
Carry me home tonight
Just carry me home tonight

The moon is on my side
I have no reason to run
So will someone come and carry me home tonight
The angels never arrived
But I can hear the choir
So will someone come and carry me home

Tonight
We are young
So let's set the world on fire
We can burn brighter than the sun

Tonight
We are young
So let's set the world on fire
We can burn brighter than the sun

So if by the time the bar closes
And you feel like falling down
I'll carry you home tonight

Click to listen

Love of that second cup

While preparing myself a bad cup of coffee today (I accidentally added WAY too much sugar), I realized that as a kid, I had no idea what coffee was supposed to taste like and probably prepared the WORST cups of coffee for my parents when my brother and I used to try to surprise them with pancake breakfasts from time to time (pancakes and instant noodles were the only things we could cook at that age).

The way it would work would be that we'd get up "early" (weekend early = 10 am) and since we were left to our own devices, we'd make pancakes and then make coffee for mom and dad.  By the time we were ready with everything was probably up to 2 hours later, but hey, we kept ourselves occupied.  Anyway, we'd put cream and sugar into the drip cups of coffee until the colours looked right, and then take our precious time walking down the (carpeted) hallway from the kitchen to their bedroom with every thing balanced on 2 plastic trays (one tray for each of us).  Mom and Dad would "wake up" (I realize now that there was probably no way that they could sleep through any racket we made in the kitchen, and dad rarely sleeps past 10:30 am when he's bone tired) and accept our eager offerings.  First would be to remove the cups of coffee (most likely thing to spill onto their bed) and take sips.

  "Mmmm!" would always be the result, but, as I mentioned, thinking about it today, those cups of coffee were probably so creamy and sweet, they were probably "mmm-ing" because their teeth were welded shut with the over-generous amount of sugar we put in, not to mention the fact that they hadn't yet had our syrup drenched pancakes yet.

Dear mom and dad,

  You guys are troupers.  Thanks for not putting down our horrible coffees skills and as such giving us the confidence to keep making coffee until we got it right.

Love,

melody

However, now that I think about it, I recall more than once catching them topping up their cups with more coffee - after pouring half of it out in the sink.  That's love.