From _______, with love

My favourite souvenir to give and receive is a postcard, personally written and sent from wherever I (or the sender) has traveled to.  It's perfect: it (usually) gives a picture of where you are, you get to personalize it with a message, and then the postage and stamp is something unique to that country.  Not only that, it's delivered right to your door (or mailbox - whichever the case, it's for YOU).

Boxing day morning found me, JBG, and a few cousins lounging around the dining table over coffee and leftovers. For the hundredth time, I complained to K about the fact that I've sent her a ton of postcards from all the places I'd been to, but I'd still yet to receive one from her from ANYWHERE.  She'd even once sent one to our grandmother from Brazil. To accommodate the fact that grandma didn't read English, K had sent her a picture of herself in Brazil with the simple message on the back: "To grandma :) *heart* K." Grandma still hadn't understood the message or who it was from, but SHE'D GOTTEN A POSTCARD.

I digress.

Jupiter asked what the big deal was with postcards.

"It's just a postcard."

Just a postcard?

I left the table to go grab my collection of postcards I'd received from around the world. I selectively pulled out the ones JBG and Brodder had sent me, including a few randoms - even that selection turned out to be quite a number.

"I got this one when I was 8, from JBG. I spent WEEKS trying to positively identify him from the pictures...why would he lie?"

"This one, I hear the song in my head EVERYTIME I read it."
"What song?"
"Meow meow meow meow - you know...the Meow Mix song?"
"Oh yeah!" *laughs*

As we dug through my collection, there a lot of laughs and a sprinkling of gasps of horror at how ruthlessly hilarious the messages were.

"What's brown and hides in the attic?
The diarrhea of Anne Frank."
"Oh gawd, that's AWFUL!  But funny.  But AWFUL!"

Catching Jupiter in a laugh, I pointed at him.

"THIS is why you send postcards."

"Yeah, I get it now."

Indeed.

Win

One of my co-workers, GB, sent me and another girl (RGD) an email at work after she had just completed a round of handing out chocolates to the team.

----------

From: GB
To: melody, RGD
Subject: Deals at Rexall

Laydeez

Good deals on once a month lady items at Rexall

----------

From: RGD

To: melody, GB

Subject: Re: Deals at Rexall

you call chocolate lady items?

----------

From: GB
To: melody, RGD
Subject: Re: RE: Deals at Rexall


Nope - I call chocolate delicious.  And I resent that you think I was only sharing cos I got a deal.  I will have you know that the chocs were full price. FULL price.  Such is the milk of human kindness within me.

----------

From: RGD
To: melody, GB
Subject: RE: Re: RE: Deals at Rexall

*mini violin*

----------

From: GB
To: melody, RGD
Subject: Re: RE: Re: RE: Deals at Rexall

*crunch* - me stepping on your mini violin

*boo hoo* - you feeling sad next time I hand out chocs and you don't get one

----------

From: RGD
To: melody, GB
Subject: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Deals at Rexall


*growl* sound that will follow you as I wait for my chocolate.

*swoosh* sound of my catlike awesomeness taking the chocolate away for my enjoyment.

----------

From: melody
To: RGD, GB
Subject: RE: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Deals at Rexall

I have no sound effects for my actions - ninjas don't make sounds...

Friday randoms

It's Friday.  It's lunchtime.  I'm ready for the weekend.
...

My work email spellcheck accepts "guesstimate" as a legitimate word.  Huh.
...

Is it bad that I read this article and found it (morbidly) amusing?  Yes, I know there's not much information, and yes, I know that it's sad that a man was killed in this accident, but the circumstances just take a turn for the ridiculous without that vital extra information.  From what I could glean from the article, my brain rewrote the events as this:

It was a dark night as a man walked down the lonely road at 3:30 am.  Suddenly, out of the darkness, a car appeared, driving too fast.  So fast, the man was struck in a instant.  While the car took off, the man stumbled, dazed and disoriented, now in the middle of the roadway.  Being as dark as it was and the hour that it was and at that particular intersection, a second, smaller car appeared too fast and struck the man again. 

The little car screeched to a stop.  Panicked, the driver dialled 911 and desperately called for help for the man on the road.  The driver jumped out after the call and ran to the man who was amazingly intact and trying to pick himself up a second time.

  "Holy shit, are you okay?!"
  "Yeah, I think so," came the disbelieving reply as the man swayed unsteadily to his feet.
  "Dude, take it easy, I just called the cops - they should be here any second."
  "Thanks - I think I might be okay."

Sirens could be heard approaching the scene.  The driver called after the man, trying to convince him to stay, but he had already begun to swagger off into the night.  A moment later, a police cruiser swung into view going too fast and struck the poor man a third time.

  "Aw fuck."

I know, I know, it's not funny...but it kinda is...
...

Dear Winning Lottery Ticket,

I know we haven't met and we've never actually spoken in person before, but I was kind of hoping we could change that this weekend.  Whadda ya say?

melody

Love/hate relationship

And the wedding planning begins.  Part of the planning (a big part) is the budgeting.  I already know this wedding is going to put us in the poor house, but what wedding doesn't?  In an attempt to save money now, I've recommited myself to bringing all of my food and drinks to work from home, refraining from having to buy them each day (not that I was always buying food/drinks, but every little bit helps).

The only thing now is that when I have food cravings that aren't for what I've brought with me, I get sad.  :(  But it's all for a good cause - my cause - OUR cause. 
...

Dear Sushi,

Don't you worry - I will devour you another day...when I've saved up enough money to do so.

love,

melody

What's in a name?

It's all the in the way you read things. 
...

At work, I'm a writer (surprise, surprise, huh?), but being a major corporate company, all of our publications need to be bi-lingual.  So, whenever I write things, I need to have them translated before I can have them published. 

This week, as much as I was slaving away with a million communications with a million modifications and a million edits and a crazy tight deadline, one single poor translator was assigned to handle my documents and requests. Usually you send your document to translation with 4 days for turnaround time.  I gave 2 days…on 6 documents. 

However, my translator was AMAZING and managed to get all of it translated and returned to me by the deadline, and even made accommodations and extra edits for all of my team’s changes.  So I decided to send a VIP notice.  A VIP notice is just a little certificate of recognition at work that the employee receives with your nice message included, and it’s also sent to their manager so that they know what good work’s being recognized.  My nice little message was as follows:

Dominique has translated an astounding number of documents over the past week - many of them rush submissions!  She has managed to come through on all of the time lines that she has promised, even accommodating all of the last minute additions and modifications that have come along on multiple projects.  Despite the complexity of each project, the technical terms, and the difficult subject matter, she's done a wonderful job and I want her to know that I really and truly appreciate all that she's done over the last few days.

Thank you, Dominique!

A little while later I got an email back from Dominique:

melody,

Thank you very much for your VIP certificate and your nice comments. I am touched!

Best regards.

Dominique

PS: I will phone my mom tonight to let her know about my VIP. I will also tell her that she should have spelled my first name with a "c", because many people think I'm a woman. (ah, ah, ah...) :-))

*hangs head in shame*

I felt like a class A idiot.  I told Dominique as such and he was nothing less than supremely gracious about it.  Probably gets it all the time from us Anglo-speakers. 
...

An exclamation would have sufficed

I recently emailed Boobin to let him know I was going to be in NYC soon.
...

From: melody
To: Boobin
Subject: July 20 - 22

NYC. I'mma be there.  Will you? :)
----------

From: Boobin
To: melody
Subject: re: July 20 - 22

I can't wait
----------

From: melody
To: Boobin
Subject: Re: re: July 20 - 22

There was zero enthusiasm in that sentence. I'm a little disappointed.
----------

From: Boobin
To: melody
Subject: re: RE: re: July 20 - 22

If it makes you feel better I teared up a little in the grocery store
----------

From: melody
To: Boobin
Subject: RE: re: RE: re: July 20 - 22

It'll have to do I suppose. I'll send you my travel details when I get home.
----------

From: Boobin
To: melody
Subject: re: RE: re: RE: re: July 20 - 22

I'm very excited. I just punched an old man in the face and yelled your last name
----------

From: melody
To: Boobin
Subject: RE: re: RE: re: RE: re: July 20 - 22

That's the spirit!
...

Hey, different people have different ways of showing how they feel. Who am I to judge?

Under my skin

I haven’t been writing lately. I was worried that it was because I now have a job that requires me to be a writer all day, but I don’t think it’s that – I produced some good stuff my first week. I think it’s my skin.

What? How could it be my skin you ask? It can. It’s draining the life out of me. I don’t sleep through the night, I’m constantly distracted because either I’m crazily itchy or my body temperature is going nuts, making me ridiculously uncomfortable, or I’m too busy trying to tend the ever changing conditions of my face that I have little to no time to do much else.

I miss writing. It saddens me that my last post was at the beginning of this month. I’ve thought of so many good thing to write (including a chronicle of what it’s like being in my skin – yes, pun intended – for a day), but I just haven’t been able to focus on something long enough to get it done. And when I have a moment of clarity, I find I have to spend it on something responsible like cooking or cleaning rather than on creative release.
...

Dear Skin,

Can’t we just be friends again?

melody

A couple more letters

Dear Self,

I am so proud of you.  You wrote your own resume, applied to a job that you wanted, and you shone the shit out of the interviews.  Excellent.  Congratulations on your new career as a writer.

Love,

Self
...

Dear Universe,

I owe you BIG time.

Thanks,

melody

Dear Universe

Dear Universe,

I know I've been writing to you kind of often lately, but let's just say it's because you've been so awesome about responding.  If you could do me a favour and just shine some good fortune on me tomorrow, that would be great--and that would probably keep me from asking about the money thing for a while too.

Thanks, Universe.

melody

Dear Universe

Dear Universe,

I DID ask for sun the other day.  Thanks for listening.

melody
...

I was talking about pathetic fallacy the other day.  It's still pathetic.  So pathetic.  But this is in the good way.  Once again, it's pouring and I'm dancing and it's great.

Dear Universe

Dear Universe,

I was thinking about writing you another letter today about you possibly sending a little money my way and it being, again, groovy and supremely awesome...

...but I guess your ESP was on today.

Thanks again,

melody

Dear Universe,

Dear Universe,

If you could toss a couple of extra bucks my way, that would be groovy and supremely awesome.

Thanks.

Perfect Gratitude

To my sister,

You don't know how much I owe you for the most perfect weekend these past two days. Without you, I would never have been allowed to smile so much, and fall so deep. You're the best family member I've never had, but will always love because you and I will never be weird, and we will always understand.

Thank you. So much.