Another step ahead

    "I'll have the steak, please."
    "Okay, sir, and how do you like your steak?"
    "I like it very much, thank you."
    "No, sir, how do you want your steak cooked?"
    "On the highest level, please."

Consciousness Slipping In (and out)

I don't get it. I sleep kinda late, I wake up kinda late. I sleep really late, I wake up really early. I'm tired.
...

I've been ODing on CSI lately. I have to say, I'm enjoying the addition of Laurence Fishburne as Ray Langston. I can't seem to get enough of this show--it just gets my nerdy bone in the right spot. That and Hodges and Sims make the ultimate beauty and the geek with emotional angst ever.
...

Last night (before AND after my attempts at sleeping), I cast out a LOT of lines. I'm hoping at least a few of them hit. It's always nice to know people care about you.
...

My pre-bedtime ritual is to delve into a book to get my eyes all sleepy. I finished my current read last night--The Book Thief--on recommendation from ehbaba. Good. Book. I almost cried. Almost. But really. It was a great read. I probably finished it in 4 sincere sittings.
...

Okay, yet another CSI marathon to go with my knitting...for as long as I can stay conscious that is.

One step ahead of you

    *SNEEZE*
    "Bless you."
    "You're welcome."
...

Yeah. So...I'm an idiot. It's okay if you don't get it--I didn't get it at first either.

Out with the old

Reorganized my sidebar links the other day. It made me sad to decide to take down the links that I hadn't clicked on myself in a very long time. They were classics, but if you hadn't clicked them already, then it was too late to do so--their glory days were over.

I did, however, add a few, so feel free to peruse...or demand that I remove them, depending on your affinity of them.

Misery loves company

I got an email. Knowing I wasn't going to reply to it, I forwarded it to a few of my ladies instead. The responses:

Oh wow... you've officially made my night, Boo. That was so damn entertaining.

That is fucking hilarious! OMG that made my night. Thanks.

That was AWESOME. I can't even give you the highlights of my favourite bits because it would be just be a copy and paste of the entire email!!!

OMG that's super creepster...

HOLY SHIT! this is totally off the reservation!!! scary!!!! Ridiculous!!!
...

I love it. It wasn't my misery that needed company--it was someone else's. :)

Colour Blind

Not everything in life can be defined as black or white. Some things are not definitely wrong, while others aren't absolutely right. There is no rulebook or manual that you can go to to see if something is right or wrong. Even in the cases where there ARE rulebooks, you should see how many little points and sub-sections there are to each rule (trust me, I've looked) because there are just that many nuances that make up any given situation. And despite all of those little points and sub-sections and additions and notes, there's always going to be that one exception to the rule.

This is the reason why we don't have robots that can do very much for us beyond anything that can be defined in binary. That's why all those movies are made over whether or not a machine programmed with 1s and 0s can actually mimic a human experience.

Life is not binary.

For those who think it is, they're missing not just the shades of grey in between, but the whole spectrum of colours that make life beautiful.

Oh bother

It's a cloudy day out...right where I am. Looking out the windows, driving in the car, I can see just far enough in the distance to the edge of the clouds and the blue skies beyond.

I feel like Eeyore...with my own little raincloud following me around.

What I live for

Job searching today. This made my day.



Needless to say, I didn't have that, so I didn't apply. :)

IPA

Only, I can't remember my IPA transliteration symbols, so we're going to have to go with good ol' phonetics.

This was a conversation that happened over the holidays. I'd forgotten about it until now, and I started to laugh my laugh again. :) The words being "phoneticized"? "Octagonal" and my friend's name, "Steph."

    "I don't think any one cares whether or not it's OC-tuh-gon-nl or not."
    "Uh, Steph, it's 'oc-TAG-uh-nl.'"
    "Oh who cares how you say it--you knew what I meant."
    "Sure, Steef."

:D

That Jimmy Kimmel bit

I think two people in my entire blogging career have ever suggested that I censor what I write. One of those people only did it once. As always, I will not be censored once I've written something, but I think it should go on the record that I don't exactly go out and post everything. Public humiliation or defamation of another's character is not exactly my style.

Sure, there are times where I just wish I could throw up anything I feel about someone or something, but sometimes I know that being the writer that I am, I can always find a better way to put it, and if I can't find that way, then I won't. I'll put it somewhere else--somewhere a little more private.

That's not to say that I'm perfect.

There are times when I post things that I've thought to sound innocent enough and they tell more than I meant to say, but hey, at least I didn't say it all. Or sometimes, there are times when I say nothing, and readers read everything into it. Either way, in both instances, it sure can get interesting, can't it?


Anywhoo...the point is...well, there's stuff I'd like to post about at this moment, that I am choosing not to...but it will come out. When I'm ready.

Because it's...

Volleyball cures everything. I was super peeved the other night, but then headed to volleyball, and all peeved-ness was forgotten. I bashed some balls, I hit the floor, I laughed at myself and at my teammates, and I felt better. In fact, when I was later faced with what I'd been peeved at in the first place, I was caught off guard and had to remember to be peeved again.

And then tonight, I was super tired. I guess the itis hit me from chowing down on a heap of pasta before practice. But heck, we started running and passing and digging and hitting and man, I forgot I was tired. In fact, despite the vigorous practice we had tonight (good job, ladies!) I left the gym with more energy than I'd had going in.

This is why I could never give it up. I admit, I tried to cut back a lot over the last two years, trying to discover what life was like (with someone) outside of volleyball, and yet, I still couldn't just give it up completely. If an entire week went by without volleyball, I'd survive, but I'd know something was missing. It's a part of me. I can't deny it. And I never will.

The sound of silence

Sitting in a very quiet house, you only want to do very quiet things. TV and video games are definitely out; even the tapping of the keys sounds too loud.

I woke up fairly early this morning and managed not to fall right back to sleep. My eye popped open and that was that. But not having much on my agenda, I refused to get out of bed and instead started re-reading my blog. Man, I used to write so much. I guess I still do, but it just seemed so condensed before.

I read and remembered the good, the bad, and the wonderful. I laughed out loud, I cried a little, and I skipped a few entries because I didn't know what to think of them anymore. 2 hours later, I consented to climbing out from under the covers to face the day. Not always the most pleasant chore.

I got up, took a shower, ate, cleaned up a little, and then flopped back onto the couch to do very little. I told you, it's been a quiet house.
...

On a side note.

If (heaven forbid) I should die anytime soon, please do not start a FB page for me using the acronym "R.I.P." anywhere on it. You may wish me to rest in peace, but please do not do so using those letters. It feels like I'd be turned into a haunted soul who wanders near my tombstone bearing those letters at night. I dunno. Maybe that's just how I feel.

No offence to anyone who's already got that on their page...

meh

Today is a comfort food sort of day. So far I've ingested mom's Chinese meatloaf, and just noticed some noodles with beef and oyster sauce in the fridge. I know what's next!

Last night, for the sake of sharing stories because I had nothing original of my own, I finally finished all that I had written while across the ocean in Europe. Feel free to click on the label and catch-up. Sorry to keep you waiting. I know how much that sucks.

Hearing things

She hears a car pull slowly onto the street outside. She hears the dull thud of a car door opening and closing. She waits to hear the footsteps up the wooden steps to her side porch. She waits to hear the knock. They don't come.

She gets up to look outside. Perhaps her visitor is hesitant? Waylaid by the unshovelled snow?

No one is outside of her house. She sees her neighbour's front door slowly swinging closed.

She goes back to the computer to stare blankly at the screen like she was doing before. She doesn't cry.

Awaiting the Cliché

There's nothing wrong with a little love cliché. The flowers, the love letters, the mixed tapes, the midnight rendezvous, the long-awaited apology. The worst is when it happens on TV or in the movies and you're forced to throw popcorn at the screen. The best is when it happens in real life and you melt into his arms and know you're the luckiest girl on earth.

In the middle is when you're kept waiting to see if it will ever happen to you, refusing to believe that it won't, but finding that you're still waiting.

Slips

    "Does he even know about me at all?"
    "No. I mean, yes."
...

I'd like to think that if someone really wants something, they'll move mountains to make it happen. You know, like move across the world.
...

It figures. Just as everyone falls in, I fall out. I worked so hard, fought so many, gave up so much, and just as it finally comes to fruition, I'm the one that fails.

I've been told time and again that I should take up teaching or this or that because I have so much patience. So much patience and a demeanor that doesn't drive people away, but encourages them to stay and keep at it. That doesn't put pressure on perfection, only personal accomplishment. And you know what? They're right. I do have a lot of patience, but even I have to admit, that as much patience as I may have, I too, have a breaking point.
...

This past Friday, I organized a cousins' night. I organized a cousins' night, and invited an AWOL favourite uncle to be the special guest. I haven't laughed so hard and so uninhibitedly in a very long time.

Soul food drink

I'd been drinking wine, stuffing myself full of greasy goodness, and watching movie after movie with a class-act couple of gals since 3pm this afternoon. We finished up right around midnight. In order to feed ourselves midway through this wallowing-allowed day, we had to ask my dad to drive our inebriated selves to the grocery store. Spectacular. But sometimes you just need those kinds of days. I know I did.

Wha'happened?

Between then and now, stuff happened.

I gave Jenny to my mom to use. I have since then acquired a temporary laptop to use until I get my act together and (get a job) and buy a new one. I have not yet decided to name this one.

Another of my friends got engaged.

The cat now refuses to drink out of his water dish. Instead, he prefers to drink dripping water out of the bathtub faucet. Whenever either of us goes to take a shower, he dashes in there to lap up the last drizzles after we turn the tap off. Because of this, sometimes we have to let the faucet drip for a bit when we get home so that he's not dehydrated. Stupid cat. I love him.

That Thundering Chicken friend of mine decided that he rather likes the CrazyBF and has since stayed over a few times this holiday to play video games with him until 7:30am. Watching them play, I have added the following words to my vocabulary if not to refer to Halo ODST, then just for my sheer amusement: Splooge gun, killtocity, and killionaire.

I am the proud owner of my very own Sackman (see Little Big Planet).

The Boos retired their 11-year old Christmas tree this year.

I bought winter tires for the first time in my driving career, and they have yet to be tested on any snow.

Another friend of mine bought a house.

I've realized that some people do grow up, some people never grow up, and some people stay the same. No matter what they do, some people you feel sorry for, some you start to like a little more, and some you love regardless.

Invictus

Out of the night that covers me,
Black as the Pit from pole to pole,
I thank whatever gods may be
For my unconquerable soul.

In the fell clutch of circumstance
I have not winced nor cried aloud.
Under the bludgeonings of chance
My head is bloody, but unbowed.

Beyond this place of wrath and tears
Looms but the Horror of the shade,
And yet the menace of the years
Finds, and shall find, me unafraid.

It matters not how strait the gate,
How charged with punishments the scroll.
I am the master of my fate:
I am the captain of my soul.

    --William Ernest Henley
...

I saw the movie of the same name tonight. It was...okay. If I liked it, I liked the two halves of it separately. I'm not going to say that Clint Eastwood is a bad director, but his last two have yet to impress me.

During the movie, I was distracted a few times.

*whack* (from the left)

    "Don't scratch!"
    "Ow! Okay!"

*whack* (from the right)

    "Don't bite your nail!"
    "Ow! Okay!"

It's because they care, right?

How many to fix a CO monitor?

The late hours were flying by as we lounged on the couches and caught up. It wasn't until well after midnight when we heard it.

*beep*

    "What was that?"

*beep*

    "Oh, it's the carbon monoxide alarm upstairs."

*beep*

    "Why is it beeping?"

*beep*

    "I don't know. It's not out of battery because it's wired into the house's electricity, and I don't think we're emitting that much CO--it just does that from time to time. Sometimes if I open the window up there, it helps."

*beep*

And so a window was open and some time was let to pass.

*beep*

    "It's still beeping."

*beep*

    "Feel free to go up and take a look. I've never been able to figure it out, and all the house builders can't seem to remember who put it there in the first place."

*beep*

And so, one left to investigate.

*beep beep beep*

    "I'm trying something!"

*beep beep beep*

    "Is there a better chair I can stand on?"

*beep beep beep*

    "Can someone pull up the manual off the internet for this thing?"

*beep beep beep*

    "I need a screwdriver!"

*beep beep beep*

Two Engineers, an Honours BA, and 2 MBAs later, TC just ripped that thing from the ceiling.

    "I feel better now."

And so, our catching up resumed sans beeping carbon monoxide alarm.