Quote of the Moment:
"It's hotter than two rats f***ing in a wool sock!"
    --Kazuhisa Ishii, when asked what his favourite American phrase was

BANANA BREAD FOR SALE!!!

Due to popular demand, mom's spending this weekend making tons and tons of banana bread. I think both she and the rest of my family is tired of when she makes banana bread and these vagrants come into the house following the smell of her baking and promptly consume all of her hard work within minutes. So, this weekend, if you want any, you can have as much as you want--for only $3 a loaf. I'd say that's a fair deal...this is GOOD stuff. Just ask...anybody!

   
   

What Would YOU Do?

"Not wanting to do any real work, I decided to browse a friend's online photo album. He'd recently posted a whole slew of photos from the past two weeks during the time which he claimed was when ALL of his friends celebrated their birthdays. As I clicked through the assorted snapshots of drunken party-goers, I was reminded of the time we'd briefly and very casually dated the previous year; it had been a year ago nearly to the day. He decided to call it quits early in the game because although both of us got along grandly, both of us knew there wasn't much of a future for us as a couple. It had been somewhat sudden, but was just as well because he met his current girlfriend soon after and I began to see other people as well.

"I giggled to myself as picture after picture of my friend came up, dazed and red-faced, being dragged along the city streets by his familiar friends. The final picture appeared soon after that which was of him and his girlfriend--they were out at a restaurant having a candlelit dinner. She was leaning against him and he had an arm lovingly draped around her as he kissed her forehead. The caption read: Me and my girlfriend on our first anniversary. It was really sweet. Then I read the date and suddenly the math clicked in my head and my jaw dropped...the bastard had cheated on me."
...

So what would YOU do if things added up like that? Me, personally? No hard feelings, especially not if he and his girlfriend are so in love. They were only casually dating anyway. As she says, it was just as well, and for the best. ;)

While I'm NOT At It

(I'm glad so many people have such an interest in my brother's art...*groan*)

I should be at school. I should be in class taking notes from my uber-boring, monotone prof's lecture. I should at least be working on ONE of my essays (still all 40 pages to go). Instead, here I am blogging, waiting for mom to give me a ride to the class that I'm already late for, just cuz I'm too damn lazy to take the bus. In light of all these things that I haven't done, I think I should really just go back to bed and start my day fresh in a few hours. :D

p.s. After making the rounds of favourite reads, I would like to mention that I judge Pablo to be a really great guy.

Oh Brother

Brodder left me a work of art on my windowsill as a surprise when I got upstairs for bed tonight. Thank goodness I realized what it was and who made it before I touched it. "But he made you a smiley face!!!" Right. You think it's sweet. I dare you to guess what it's made out of...

Call Me Baron

Boo's production of Faust was yesterday (well, today too, but I only went to yesterday's). SO GOOD. I went in with only a slight clue of what Faust was about, but by the end, I was chilled to the bone by the heartwrenching effects both of the endings had on me. SO GOOD!!! I'm so proud of Boo.

Hydro, Squig, Hun-Gee and I piled into the car at 6:30 and flew to the show, squeaking in the doors just moments before curtains up (though there were no curtains). To be honest, I was worried about Squig and Hun-Gee's attention spans while the play progressed; the themes they were working with were kind of hard to grasp, and the fact that the two of them had NO clue as to what Faust would be about didn't help. But, lo and behold, by the end of the first act, Hun-Gee stood up after watching Boo fight off her supposed lover, with a "wow." That says a lot. And then by the end of the second act, Squig stood up and walked out with a smile--the smile of his that said "that was SO worth it." Thank goodness.

(In case you're wondering, I had no fears about Hydro's attention span when it came to Faust--she's a fellow intellect...and for FUN too!)

All the way home, with Boo in the car, we analysed, praised, and picked apart the production piece by piece (well the girls did anyway) and decided that overall, it was a job well done by Boo and her fellow actors. Yay!!!

**I think I had more of a point to this post, but as I was torn away by mom and dad for dinner with Grandmama, I kinda lost it. Good dinner though. :)

Surf's Up

It's only been 45 minutes, but I'm already starting to feel the effects of this morning's early workout with Señorita (see, I DID get up!!!). Owwie. This oughta be good. Let's just see if this works out to be the weekly routine that we hope it will be. Stress on hope.

I came home after our workout and decided to take it easy and surf the net a bit, always starting from my own list of favourite links of course. I decided to see what Kristine had been up to lately, and it turns out that she'd made an appearance (vocal, of course) on fellow label artist's track; Kast XL's Triad. I decided to listen to it and it gave me shivers in a serious-subject, operatic, funky-vocal kind of way. I confess, I'm kinda hooked. His lyrics were tight and her vocals were awesome in that eerie kind of way (you'll have to hear it to know what I mean). I listened to most of the tracks on his page, and just this once, I'm going to do the thing they suggest to and add a banner to this post. Cuz he's pretty good. And he's in with Kristine. But mostly cuz he's good. Go take a listen...I think I'm going to take a nap now. :)

So That's Where It Was...

I cleaned my room this weekend. And by "cleaned" I mean attacked everything in there with Swiffer cloths, the cleaning spray, and the vacuum. You can eat off of ANYTHING in there right now. I'll be honest, it hadn't been cleaned so thoroughly in a LONG time, and this was a MAJOR task I took on this weekend, especially seeing as it took me the full two days to get the job done. Anyway, after all was said and done, it was well worth the effort cuz I found a whole bunch of stuff that I'd forgotten about including:
    -    3 pairs of earrings I thought I'd lost
    -    4 cds that had gone missing months ago
    -    $20 american
    -    a wad of sticky notes from an unproductive study session with Boo
    -    a watch
    -    a necklace
    -    the funky lightshade mom and dad got me at Christmas
    -    my very first ring from a boyyyyy
Gotta love the stuff you find for the second time. It probably wouldn't have taken me so dang long to clean and rearrange everything if I wasn't so susceptible to such long fits of nostalgia and trips down memory lane. You know, when you pick up some thing that you haven't looked at in a while and then you spend at least five minutes looking at it and remembering about the last time you picked that thing up and looked at it for a while? And then you realize how long you've been spending looking at that one thing, so you put it down and it's not even thirty seconds until you pick up the next thing and think about that thing for the next little while...yeah, that's how it is when I clean my room and I have no intention of changing my methods.

As an update, my room has been clean for almost 5 whole days now--I think we're coming up on a new record. I know mom's proud, but I'm getting a little uneasy what with everything being where it should be and not in an easily accessible blob encompassing my desk and floor in one fell swoop. I think this could get interesting...I'll keep you posted. ;)

       

...

p.s. Señorita, just try to ignore the time stamp on this...I swear I'll get up in the morning!!!

Phazers Set To Flashy

The door sensors in the library here at school keep getting set off by students lugging their laptops and notebooks in and out, or because their radioactive metallicized books weren't desensored properly. The alarm sounds like some sort of space death-ray. I can't see the doors or their sensors from where I'm sitting, but everytime I hear the alarm go off, I picture that the poor student trying to pass through is immediately pinpointed by lasers and vapourized in a flash of eerie green light, a "deer-caught-in-headlights" expression as the last to cross their faces. Poor souls, and all they wanted to do was learn.

That's The Way It Always Happens
    "An old walrus-faced waiter attended to me; he had the knack of pouring the coffee and the hot milk from two jugs, held high in the air, and I found this entracing, as if he were a child's magician. One day he said to me--he had some English--'Why are you sad?'
    "'I'm not sad,' I said, and began to cry. Sympathy from strangers can be ruinous."
    --Iris, The Blind Assassin by Margaret Atwood
...

I remember this one time, long, long ago, I came home from high school, heartbroken from witnessing my ex-boyfriend getting on the bus with a hoarde of giggling girls, not even a week after breaking-up with me ("dumping" is such a harsh word). I had climbed on the next bus to come along, having refused to get on the same one as him, and willed myself not to cry for the whole ride. I didn't. In fact, I'd managed to bury my heartache so deeply that by the time I got home, it was nothing more that a grumble in the bottom of my stomach. I had even begun to think about what I wanted to do that night instead. But the moment I stepped through the front door, my mother took one look at me and asked me if I needed a hug. I told her I didn't and then burst into tears. She's not a stranger, but it's the same effect. Mother knows best, I suppose.

I Swear, It's Not What It Looks Like!

I just spent the last hour signing up at LiveJournal, just so I could post a comment to Janette's page. Whew! But don't worry (not that any of you ARE worrying), I believe I'm sticking with my blog here. I just can't think about having to go through setting up another page just to my likings. Goodness knows that when I tried to change all the aesthetic settings of my blogspot, it took me a whole week before it started to look even kind of what it looks like now. I'm a writer, not a programmer/designer!

One thing that bothered me while I was trying to register for LiveJournal had to do with their password setting. A password is supposed to be a secret thing, right? Something that should only be known and matter to me, right? Then why did they give me such a hard time while I was trying to set mine?

LJ Prompt: Please enter a password.
Me: xxxxxx
LJ: That password does not contain enough different characters. Please enter another password.
Me: xxxxxxxxx (here I just added "456" to the end of my original password)
LJ: That password contains a dictionary word. Please enter another password.
Me: xxxxx
LJ: That password is too short. Please enter another password.
Me: xxxxxxxxx
LJ: wtf is that? Are you sure you want to put that? Do you really think you're going to remember that? Well don't come emailing me when you forget what your hD3r53Kdn-password is.
Me: "@&#$!!"

Really, who the hell is on the other side of the screen anyway??? I swear they were just bored and screwing around with me.

He Calls It "Random Jabbering"; I'll Call It "Jabbering Randomly"

Something's wrong at school: I waited in the Tim Horton's line for less than 3 minutes--two days in a row! Creepy...

I was doing the calculations last night (as opposed to my homework) and I figured out that I have two weeks to write forty pages worth of essays. FORTY!!! I think that in itself shall explain my up-coming absense from blogger. *groan*

Where's the beef? You're right, Pablo, I am starting to miss you and your cruel words of wit that accompany your attempted yet ineffectual attacks on my intelligence.

After reading Shaky's second most recent post, I'm reminded of the fact that I'm deathly afraid of growing up. Not growing old, but growing up, and (as he says) becoming responsible for myself. *shudder* And soon after that, I was reminded by the same post that I'm afraid of showing up at Shaky's birthday to have him passout on my boobs again. *shudder*

Had another tea/bath courtesy of my herbalist last night. Tuna was over while the stuff was bubbling on the stove; he gagged at the smell. At the smell!!! And I have to drink that stuff. Nasty I tells ya.

If you stand still and look straight up into the sky on a day that it's softly snowing those huge clumps of snowflakes, it feels like you're staring up into infinity. I get dizzy when I do that.

I also get dizzy when I try to help Tuna find Schrodinger's cat--quantum physics are weird.

Speaking of weird, my room's clean and has been so for 2 days now. The world's going to end soon I tells ya.

If the world's going to end, it'll have to wait until after Friday night--I gotta go (with Squig, Hydrophobe, and Hun-Gee) see Boo appear in Faust first!

Darwin was not the first to "stumble" on the theory of evolution--he only made it popular.

Tim Horton's has problems with their probabiility--I've had MORE than twenty coffees, and I've only won once. I even figured out how to actually roll up the rim...as opposed to gnawing on that thing like a deranged chipmunk on a caffeine-high.

Speaking of coffee, I want one. Anyone want to join me? I'll teach you to roll up the rim, though I don't guarantee any winning. :)

The Results Are In...

Did I make it? Did I make it? I actually did a few more things than my list dictated:
    -     read some old email of mine and Esquire's
    -     added Belle du Jour's blog to my list of links...I'm in love with her, I really am
    -     started downloading an episode of CSI that I think I already have
    -     read more than one of Hydrophobe's posts (tehe)
    -     tried to get my Roger's website up again, only to fail miserably

However, I didn't make my phone call, nor did I do the last three things I listed previously because I decided to save them until after this post. But now that I'm done, I'm gonna do those things. Yay Time Management!!! (but please try not notice that it's only 15 minutes early than last night's post... :S )

In The Interest of Honesty...

Alright, in an attempt to prevent the crazy late hours I've been keeping, I'm going to set a time line for myself. Here are the things I'm ALLOWED to do, and I'm going to try to give myself only 45 minutes to do them in:
    -    eat Boo's home-made, but take-out potato salad
    -    finish replying to Esquire's email
    -    send Hydrophobic Fish an email
    -    read ONE of Hydrophobe's posts from her recently revealed blogsite ;)
    -    make ONE ultra-important phone-call
    -    post one more time
    -    do get-ready-for-bed things
    -    get into bed
    -    read until I pass out

I'm going to post one more time so that you can all see whether or not I made my time limit--and if I didn't, you're all free to reprimand me--and I promise I won't fiddle with the time stamping! And awayyyyy I go!

"It's No Use Capt'n: She Don't 'ave The Power!"

Just wanted to post so that you could all know that I'm still awake at this hour. I thought I'd just put up my last peeving post and go to bed, but nope, not the case. Instead, I began what I thought was going to be a casual perusal of my usual reads, but now I'm up, and:

• considering opening a LiveJournal account
  
• wondering what Hydrophobic Fish's* web address is (*Hydrophobic Fish being the new name for Pro-Shopper)
  
• cursing the fact that my Rogers webpage won't initiate itself
  
• realizing that my world is shrinking at an exponential rate (I learned it was 888's b-day from a stranger's page!)
  
• worrying about the fact that I have 3 more essays due by the end of this month
  
• getting distracted by more blog-surfing
  
• wishing I had my own server and website
  
• dreaming that one day all I'll ever have to do is sit around, read, and write all day while sitting in the sun

I think I've read about 20 different posts/pages in the last hour or so, meanwhile I've been trying to go to bed for the last three hours. I suck. I just don't have the will-power to rip myself away from this screen--I might miss something! Someone might post! The pictures on my page might work by themselves!

Amusing Digression:
Mom's been trying to get Brodder and I to try all these natural creams for our skin. Today she wanted us to slather aloe on our faces straight from her plant that lives on the landing of the stairs. Of course we were too lazy to go and cut ourselves a few pieces to do so and continued to putz around the computer together instead. The next thing you know, Mom comes flying out of nowhere, flying-tackles me, puts my head in a mega-death-grip, and slathers me with this slice of aloe, me screaming the whole time and Brodder laughing hysterically.

She managed to swipe the plant under my nose and I mentioned that I felt violated as though she'd just given me a "Dirty Sanchez." Of course I had to explain my use of terms and she found my definition a little more than amusing. She was still laughing as she made her way back to the kitchen, chiming in with Brodder's still quieting outburst from earlier. Brodder and I turn back to what we were doing and all was calm once again. But not for too long. Next thing you know, Mom comes flying out of nowhere again and flying-tackles Brodder, applying the same death-grip as before, but exclaiming "Dirty Sanchez!" as she slathered his face with the aloe. Oh Modder. And people wonder where Brodder and I get our humour from?
...

Back to the blogging going to sleep. It looks like my computer/internet is crashing anyway and I can’t even restart the computer because Brodder is converting his precious anime. I think it'll be a miracle if this post makes the publish...night. ZZZzzzzzZzzzzZZZzzzZZZzZzzzz

Hands-Free Means NO HANDS!!!

Today was a do-nothing day. Señorita came over to finish her 5 page assignment that was due LAST WEEK at 10:45am, and though I let her into the house, I crashed again and didn't emerge from my room until 1:00pm--class, by then, was basically a write off. Instead, I accompanied Señorita to school for her to sneak into her class 1/2 an hour LATE, after slipping her LATE assignment into her prof's box. While she was in class, I was going to study but found Boo instead and had chocolate milk with her in one of York's new buildings. My time was better spent that way anyway. :)

To get to the point, Señorita and I went to catch bubble-tea before my volleyball practice and were seated opposite a pair of older (not elderly but older) chinese ladies. At first, no big deal, but then one of the ladies' cell phones starts ringing. No big deal...until she lets it ring 10 times while examining the caller ID slot and fitting her hands-free set into her ear before finally flipping open the phone to answer it. Then what do I notice? Lady HOLDS the phone up to her mouth still to talk.

You must be thinking, "Well, DUH, you've got to hold the phone up to your mouth so that the other person you're speaking to can hear you!" Yes, that is true, but NOT WHEN YOU'RE USING A HANDS-FREE HEADSET!!! Lady holds this phone out in front of her mouth as though it's a compact and she's checking her lipstick. I stared bewildered at Lady for quite some time while Señorita glanced between the Lady and me and laughed. Finally she closes her compact phone and goes back to stuffing her face full of over-priced chinese food, and I am able to continue my bubble-tea drinking and pestering the waitress for bringing Señorita the wrong drink.

Next thing you know, Lady's phone rings again, and of course I'm already gawking to see what she does. 10 rings later, after examining the caller ID and fitting in her hands-free, she flips the phone open to answer it. This time, she leaves the phone on the table while she has her conversation--Señorita and I quietly applauded Lady for her seeming competence this time. I say "seeming competence" because this show of intelligence didn't last for long. Lady put down the phone so that she could hold the mouthpiece of her hands-free right up against her lips. Again, I stared bewilderedly at her. I myself own one of these hands-free sets and I know that it picks up EVERY little sound, and it wasn't even like the tea shop was loud at all to begin with. Besides, Lady's a chinese person talking on the phone and god knows they talk loud enough for the WORLD to hear what they're conversing about.

Personal Etiquette Summary:
    1.    If you receive a phone call in a not-so-loud restaurant, answer it quickly so the ringing does not disturb other patrons.
    2.    If answering a phone call in the middle of a meal, you need not keep stuffing your face while talking so that gawking patrons can see what you're eating and what stage of digestion it's in.
    3.    If answering a phone call while out with another friend, keep the call short and get back to your physically present friend--she was there first (poor Lady's friend had to wait about 10 minutes total while Lady was on the phone).
    4.    A hands-free head-set is a device used to keep your hands free for uses other than holding a phone to your ear...don't use your hands!!! These men may look like dumb-asses, but at least they have it figured out...

On the plus side, however, I had bubble-tea and a good gawking laugh with Señorita before hitting the courts. :)

Ketchup Catsup Catch-Up
omg there's a lot of this to be done...

The End Of An Era

No, contrary to popular belief, that theatre is NOT closing down to lack of attendance. I quit my job. Yup. February 26th was my last day at my beloved, first-ever legitimate job at the theatre. 5 and a half years I lived, breathed, ate, slept, grew-up, matured, and experienced the working life with all the others there. There are only a handful of the original staff left but we always had fun.

They bought me a day at the spa along with a huge card as a farewell, and took me out for sushi lunch at KEN'S (my fave) where we had some good times involving pictures, sampling, reminiscing, and too much wasabi (bwahahaha!)

Quote of the day: "..ooOOooHhhh..." --TK, after stepping up the the challenge, and not quite making it...

I confess, I already miss the guys--literally, they're all guys there--and am kind actually looking forward to going to pick up my last paycheque this Thursday, just so I can have an excuse to drop in and say 'hi'. Don't tell, but I'm planning on baking them cookies to munch on during their Thursday night goof-offs...ah, the memories. Thanks guys.
...

Strawfairy Who???
That's right, those who know, know. I was moved to tears the other night when this particular magical being walked up my side-porch to appear at my door wielding a volleyball. For me. A Tachikara. My very own Tachikara volleyball. *sigh* He said it was his thank-you gift to me for all the free movies I snuck him and the gf into. I wish I hadn't so hastily quit now that I know what my generousity gets me. ;) But really, THANK YOU L---- MOFO!!! (you're not really a mofo--I just like the fact that the guys called you that) *sniff* I really was going to cry when you handed that over to me...you really didn't have to. You needn't have thanked me. But thank-YOU!!! Now let us have a moment to admire the beauty that is the volleyball.

...

It's A Bird...It's A Plane...It's Super-Mel!!! No, Wait, It's A Plane...
I think sometime last year or the year before, my parents bought my brother gift certificates for a flying lesson for his birthday. For the duration of time since that birthday until 2 weeks ago, my brother left those gift certificates clipped to the fridge, saving them for the day hell froze over. Unfortunately for him, my parents thwarted his patient plans and booked not only him, but myself as well, into a flying lesson two Sundays ago.

At first, I admit, I was reluctant to go. Not because I was afraid of flying or anything, but more or less because my parents wanted me to do this and so I felt it was my daughterly-duty to put up some resistance. I had better things to do, like pretending to do homework, preparing the Wheels section of the Star for Squig, or holding the phone to my ear while there was a silent person on the other line doing the same sort of thing. But two o'clock rolled around and there Brodder and I were, in the car with Dad up to the airport. And then we were being ushered out onto a barren and windy airstrip, each of us armed with our own pilot, mini-briefcase, and headsets.

My instructor/pilot was Ellie; she took me out to the plane and literally gave me a crash course on what to look for before take-off. Then she threw me and my mini-briefcase--containing important flight/plane ownership documents--into the plane (which was a cessna and really no bigger than my Civic) plugged my headset in and continued my crash course in there.
    "When we're on the ground, you steer with your feet, when we're in the air, you steer with your hands. Ever riden a roller coaster before?"
    "Yup. I love'em."
    "Good, cuz that's what it's going to feel like up there. This plane is small so you'll feel every little bump. It may seem kinda scary, but don't worry, it's not going to fall apart--it's supposed to be shaky."

And she wasn't kidding. After getting the hang of taxiing on the ground, Ellie let me send the plane down the runway and pull the throttle to take-off on my own. And I did...and my stomach hit the base of my spine--what a rush!!! It was awesome from there on in. We were in the air for at least half an hour; we headed north towards Lake Simcoe while Brodder's pilot, Chris, took them south towards TO. It was definitely an experience to have control over a plane like that, seeing the horizton dip, rise, or tilt left and right in front of me at my will.

Ellie landed the plane later and as soon as we got back into the hangar, I called Hun-Gee and Vin to tell them all about it. I knew Vin would appreciate it the most since we'd already discussed his notion of one day becoming a pilot. About half an hour later, after Dad came back to pick us up and my stomach had finally calmed itself (I wasn't going to be sick, but for sure I had yet to grow air-legs), I had already arranged with Hun-Gee to send Vin on one of these flights for his upcoming birthday. Go Vin!!!

And as a sidenote, I think Chris, Brodder's pilot-dude, is also the super-awesome volleyball player that I think looks like the Coldplay guy that I blocked in that tournament ever-so-long ago. Not terribly important but adds to the coolness just the same.

...

Not A Fan Of The Fans, Are They?
On the leap year day, myself and nine other of those dearest to me, trekked off to the Raptors Game. How was a feat of such organization possible, you ask? It was possible through the incredible generousity and kindness (and promotional raise) of Squiggly's over-priced, yet simultaneously priceless Christmas gift to the Boobies. The togetherness was awesome. The game was...just slightly disappointing. Raptors versus Celtics. Not only were all the key players from BOTH teams injured, but both teams were scoring incredibly slowly and lowly. Not only did we lose after holding the lead for quite some time, but we didn't even score enough points to get a free slice of pizza.

The Raps only needed to score 84 points in order for all the fans to get a free slice of pizza after the game. That's not even that high of a score--it USED to be 100 points before you got fed. But nOOoOoooOo. At 82 points and 7 seconds left on the clock, the Raptors, with their last possession of the ball decided to shoot for a three and MISS!!! Why would you shoot for a three when you haven't scored a single three-pointer ALL GAME?!?!?! I mean, we weren't really upset that they lost, but to keep us from getting FREE FOOD by throwing away TWO POINTS? That was just mean of them. Nevertheless, the majority of us Boobies wandered to Marché for some munchies where we were later graced with the presence of three of the Raptors: What's-his-name, Who's-his-face, and Whojamacallit*. (*Dion Glover, Michael Curry, and Jannero Pargo, respectively) No autographs were hounded for.

Sure our team lost. Sure we didn't get free pizza. But the fact that we all had an excuse to be in each other's presence outside of our Christmas ritual was more than enough to smooth those facts over. Plus, we got free Goldfish crackers to maturely munch on and throw at each other all the way to Marché. What more could we have asked for?

It's Pat!!!

For those of you who don't know, today was a HUGE day for me. An extremely stressful one that even threw my body out of sync because it stressed me out so badly. Today was the LAST day for me to take my G2 exit test and PASS. If I didn't pass, then, since my license expired after the test, I would've been demoted down to the rank of commuter, and would have been rideless for however long it would've taken me to write my G1 test and get my G2 again. What's worse is that this wasn't my first time taking the test. I'd taken it before and FAILED. So my confidence was already on the ropes with this test.

Last night, I couldn't sleep. This morning I couldn't eat. I nearly didn't get out of bed either simply due to the fact that I couldn't get over the fact that I had failed before--I figured that this attempt would be in vain, I'd fail, and I'd find myself back in bed, buried under a mountain of depression caused from the realization that I was indeed a failure. Usually I'm tougher than that. But it was simply the fact that I'd failed last time due to opinionative demerits that caused me not to want to deal with these stingy testing people ever again. If one didn't want me to pass cuz she was having a bad day, why would anyone else?

Alright, so last night I overkilled on the practice driving, the parallel parking, and the checking of the blind spots. This morning, I picked up my faithful accompaniment, Ly (for should I fail, I would need someone else to drive me home since I wouldn't have a LICENSE), and headed to pay my $75 fee for them to fail me. While Ly took a nap in the Ministry (thanks so much for coming, Ly), I waited in the car and secretly hoped that some hot, young, and easily swayed male would step into my car and pass me just on account of my good looks and the cool deck installed in the car. No such luck (though I DO have the looks); up to my car walks this homey looking, middle-aged mom with a nice little border of flowery stickers pasted to her clipboard in order to get my hopes up in thinking that she's a nice lady who'll pass everyone she meets. Pfft, I think to myself.

After checking out my lights, signals, and horn-tooters (hehehe), she climbs into the car and gives me the mandatory speech about what's about to happen, and then asks me to sign by the Xs, asking me if I was okay with all this. I told her I was nervous. The last time I told that to my tester, I swear she almost "muahahaha"-ed me in my face, so imagine my surprise when homey-looking-middle-aged-mom-with-flower-stickers tells me sweetly not to be nervous and to try to focus on my driving so that I wouldn't do anything I normally wouldn't do. Wow.

Turns out that homey-looking-middle-aged-mom-with-flower-stickers is really exactly that: a homey-looking-middle-aged-mom-with-flower-stickers! We didn't exactly have a heart-to-heart discussion during my test, but we chatted a bit, especially when I ill-wished the teenaged-smokers on the sidewalk without their coats on.

    "I hope they freeze out there!"
    "Me too! My son just became one of those..."

Wow. Anyway, I mustered up the courage to ask her opinion about the things I supposedly did wrong last time causing me to fail. Guess what she said? THAT I SHOULDN'T HAVE FAILED!!! Damn other tester on PMS--I swear if I ever find you...argh!!! @_:@

Needless to say, I passed my test, although the clinching factor was when the idiot taking his test ahead of me (who made a right turn from the middle lane) was asked to pull into the second driveway while I got to pull into the first. :D My tester lady told me I did a GREAT job (ya hear that PMS lady?!?!--"GREAT") and asked me if I needed anything else.

    "Thank you! omg, no, I don't think I need anything else, but thank you SO much...um...what's your name?"
    "Oh, my name's Pat,"
    "Thank you SO much Pat!"

Yes, thank you SOOOOO much, Pat. She'll never know what sort of weight she lifted off my shoulders; she not only made my day, week, and month, but possibly a whole separate strain of my future.
...

Though I was so thrilled to have passed, I wasn't so thrilled to know that the Ministry wrongfully claimed 75 dollars more of my money than they should have, and that I now have to pay them 40 MORE dollars just for them to take another hideous mug-shot of me. That's money-mongering if I've ever heard of it...

p.s. Thank you SOOOOOO much, Pat!!!

Quote of Last Weekend:
"Soooo, you went snowboarding with the guys and now that you're back, you're exhausted and your ass is sore cuz it took a pounding?"
    --my description of a guy's first try at snowboarding with the guys...

You Wanna Be A What?

When people ask me what I want to do when I finish University, I tell them that I want to be a writer. And then when they ask me what I want to write, I tell them that I want to be a fictionalist. Mostly story stories or children's stories--I don't quite feel that I have a novel in me. And then they ask me why. Why? Because I like to write. I get a kick out of it. And just to prove it, I'm going to share a story that I wrote today while listening to my prof lecture about Emerson. Be nice, it's just for fun, and I haven't had time to edit it yet, and probably won't for a while cuz I'm off to volleyball after posting this. I'm hoping that one day this story will have pictures, but until then, use your imagination. Enjoy!

A Brief History of Family Ties

    Once upon a time, long, long ago, in a land far, far away, there was a place called Worklessity. In Worklessity, there was no such thing a job and no one there had to do any work. In fact, the only thing that anyone ever did in Worklessity was relax and play all day. Well, everyone played all day except for one family—the Boss family.
    The Bosses—Ma, Da, and Yor—were the only three people who ever did any work because they lived on the only farm in Worklessity and therefore they were the only source of food for the city. The Bosses liked their work and didn’t mind farming for and feeding everybody because there were only ten people who lived in Worklessity in total and so everyone lived happily.
    However, somehow the reputation of the city being a place where everyone could just play all day was spread around the world and suddenly, in one week, Worklessity’s population exploded from ten to one thousand!
    At first, the Bosses worked extra hard on their farm, making it bigger, planting and growing more food for all those new people. But after three days, the Bosses were exhausted and found that the farm was too big and busy for them to tend to by themselves. They were so tired, but they knew that people would starve without the food from their farm, so they decided to ask the citizens to help out with the work.
    First, Yor went from house to house, person to person, introducing himself and asking if anyone would help him work on the farm. Everyone laughed at him and rudely turned him away, each saying the same thing.
    “Yor Boss? We don’t want to work for Yor Boss. Go away, you’re interrupting our relaxing and playing.”
    And so, the Bosses were forced to work another day by themselves.
    The next day, Ma went from house to house, person to person, introducing herself and asking if anyone would help her work on the farm. Everyone laughed at her and rudely turned her away, each saying the same thing.
    “Ma Boss? We don’t want to work for Ma Boss; we didn’t even want to work for Yor Boss. Go away, you’re interrupting our relaxing and playing.”
    And so, the Bosses were forced to work another day by themselves.
    The next day, Da went from house to house, person to person, introducing himself and asking if anyone would help him work on the farm. Everyone laughed at him and rudely turned him away, each saying the same thing.
    “Da Boss? We didn’t want to work for Ma Boss or Yor Boss; why would we work for Da Boss? Go away, you’re interrupting our relaxing and playing.”
    And so, the Bosses were forced to work another day by themselves.
    At the end of the week, the Bosses were so tired that they couldn’t go on. They decided that they had to get the people to work, whether they wanted to or not, or else they would all starve. So the Bosses called a meeting and formed a plan.
    That night, while all the citizens of Worklessity were fast asleep, the Bosses snuck around and carried twenty people back to their farm. In the morning, those selected citizens woke up to find themselves in the fields of the Bosses’ farm. Each of those citizens were attached to a post in the dirt by a long cloth sash tied around their neck. Each of them tried to get the tie off, but they couldn’t—the ties were knotted in such a complicated way that they couldn’t figure out how to undo it.
    Before the citizens could start complaining, the Bosses appeared on top of a shed so that they could speak to all of the people in their field at once.
    “People, do not be angry!” Da said, “We brought you here because we needed help. We need you to help us work the fields. We are going to pay you for your work by having first choice at the food you produce, and don’t worry, at the end of the day, we will untie you from your posts and you can go home to play.” Some of the people in the field groaned, but some nodded that it was a fair trade. Ma continued to speak where Da had left off.
    “However, we still need help to feed everyone, so if no one shows up tomorrow to help work, we will have to sneak out and tie more people down again.” Finally, it was Yor’s turn to speak.
    “If you have any questions, please let us know. Just so that you all know who we are, I am Yor Boss. If I can’t answer your questions,” Yor pointed at Ma, “Ma Boss will be able to, and if she can’t, then,” Yor pointed at Da, “that’s Da Boss, and Da Boss will have the final say. Thanks for working for us.”
    And from that day forth, the Bosses never had any trouble finding workers ever again. Soon, because people thought it was so great to be able to have first choice of food after working, workers would show up early with their own ties around their necks so that they would be guaranteed a spot in the field—this way it would look like a Boss put them there first.
    Ever since the Bosses’ ingenious idea of tying people to their jobs, companies everywhere began to hire people who came with their own ties. Nowadays, of course, people still wear ties, though they no longer have to attach the other end to a pole near their work station. Needless to say, Da, Ma, Yor, and the subsequent generations of the Boss family were very successful in Worklessity for a long time, until their great-great-great-great-grandson had an epiphany, sold the family farm, and moved to Germany to start a new business supporting workers looking for jobs: Hugo started a work-clothing line, specializing in ties.

Hey, Want Some Herbs?

I think I'm in love. I think I'm in love with my herbalist. No, really.

After trying tubes and bottles and vats of creams upon creams, pre-scriptioned and not, I'd just about nearly given up on my eczema-strickened skin. My itchies had gotten as bad as they'd ever been in years. Watching in agony for the past many months and yet still on the losing side of the battle with my skin, my mother took charge of me and decided to drag me to the Chinese herbalist that my family had relied on for years to provide us with relief of all of our many and diverse ailments with her strange, stinking, but wonderful concotions.

We got down to her house and were led into her tiny front office which doubled as her examination room. She sat me down on a chair by her desk and gave me a looksee, all the while chatting to my mom (who sat on the acupuncture table) in Chinese about me and my symptoms. After taking a look at a couple of my most prominent patches of grossness, she took my pulse from both of my arms. After this, she was up and bustling around her office/examination/acupunture room which quadrupled as her herbal storage room, weighing out herbs into a paper bag for me to take home and boil into a broth of which I was to drink a cup of, and then use the rest to have a bath in.

?!?!?!

Yeah, I understand. Who would boil up some stuff to drink, and then decide to have a bath in it too? (Wait...that's what we do with water...) Well, that's what I did. Now, imagine the smell that emanates into the halls from a Chinese herb store at the mall. Now multiply that by 100, add some essence of dog-poop, toe-fungus, and month-old gym socks and you'll have the smell that filled my kitchen that day from boiling this stuff. And yes, after faithfully gagging down a cup of this stuff, I hauled the rest to the bathroom from the most stinging, stinking sponge bath I'd ever had. If anything, I did to get my mom off my case before I took a dive back into my ointments and lotions.

The next day, I was so lightheaded at volleyball I had to sit out the game (**note: for those of you who don't know me, it is a BIG deal for me to SIT OUT of a game) and my skin seemed to have turned a shade darker, not to mention that my patchy eczema was STILL THERE!!! I was kinda disappointed all day since although I'd been kinda skeptical of that broth, it was still my last resort next to peeling off my own skin.

Today, however, LOOK!!! I can't say my skin is perfect, but I've barely scratched all day and I definitely can see a difference! I'm not so blotchy, and my forehead seems to be staying on today. I'm thrilled. Words cannot express my enthusiam. And it's all thanks to the herb lady. If there was any lesson I would want to take from this post, it would be that you should accept and ingest herbs offered to you by little old chinese ladies no matter how bad they stink because they're probably good for you. In short, say "yes" to herb(s).