What To Do?

A business card found its way into my hands today as a customer left the restaurant. A message was scrawled on the back:

I'm in Toronto until June
1st for work - would love to
go dancing/music/?? -
call me.
Marriott Courtyard rm ####,
Yonge and College.
I don't do this with everyone -
you seem really sweet.

What should I do?

Just Like In The Movies

The man who loves me will:
    - find me with Serendipity
    - befriend me from thirteen until thirty and beyond
    - woo me like Leopold
    - sniff me like Mekhi
    - protect me like a Creasy Bear
    - be my hero like Shrek
...and love me forever.

After movies like these, I always feel a little lonely.

Speaking Of Love

I love Gennie-Boo! Hear that? I LOVE GENNIE-BOO!!! Sure he may be Boo's Boo, but I love him too! Because of Gennie-Boo's awesomeness, I may no longer have to be on such a tight budget now when I go out or when I windowshop with others. Because of Gennie-Boo, I HAVE A JOB!!! :) I love you, Gennie-Boo! Oh, and so does Boo. And Squiggly too. ;)

He Loves Me

Today is Bar's birthday (Happy Birthday, Bar!) and he's going to be having dinner at his favourite sushi restaurant. It's a small little place, owned and operated by the single chef there, Ken, but it's the best place around, and consequently my own favourite sushi restaurant as well. Over the years, Bar and I have gotten to know Ken and Ken has gotten to know us. Since we know he's the only chef there and Bar's expecting twelve or more people to dinner, we thought we'd give Ken a heads up that he was going to have a big group. And so, I gave him a call last night to let him know just that.

    Me - Hi Ken, it's melody. It's Bar's birthday tomorrow and we're coming to dinner! There'll be about 12 - 15 of us arriving there at 7:30.
    Ken - Okay. Wow, big party, eh?
    Me - Hehehe, yeah. We don't want to stress you out too much tomorrow or have you over worked so we wanted to let you know in advance. And can we pre-order some stuff too so that you won't be so rushed?
    Ken - Of course! What would you like to order?
    Me - *tells him our load of pre-ordered sushi selections* Okay?
    Ken - Yes, alright. That's tomorrow, 7:30, and thank you for letting me know--this is great; I love you!
    Me - Oh, okay, no problem! Thanks Ken!
    Ken - Thank you!

(He tells me he loves me and all I say is "thank you"--I feel like Emily from that F·R·I·E·N·D·S episode)

He's so great; can you see why he's my favourite sushi chef? I can't wait till dinner tonight!!!

Summer Colours

Bronze
I have a tan. Heavens above, I have a tan! I usually remain pasty white for the whole summer, but yet, five days of beautiful, sunny weather and I've already become somewhat bronzed. It might have something to do with the fact that I do NOTHING during the days anymore as I am unemployed (but looking!), and unfortunately, as Squiggly points out, while I get tanned, he gets paid--a perception that almost takes all the fun out of lying in the sun. :( Sometimes I think it's almost worth it though: heading clubbing on Friday, my beautifully bronzed skin was enough to make a driver miss the fact that the light had already changed to green as he was too busy inspecting me for any tan lines (which I know for a fact he could find none). That was pretty gratifying for a girl that rarely gets any attention otherwise. ;)

Yellow
I was at Tim Horton's earlier today catching an Ice Cappuccino with Hun-Gee before he headed out for the week, and I noticed a couple of yellow cars parked next to each other outside. I think the drivers were friends because they were standing next to their cars, chatting, laughing, and having a good time as their cars sparkled in the sunlight. As nice as their cars looked out there, I knew they weren't those people who meet to talk about their cars and what they've done to them because they owned two fairly different cars: a Mitsubishi Lancer and a Nissan 240, but both sexily yellow.

Even though they hadn't necessarily met to talk about their cars, it got me thinking; what if people had car meets not to compare modifications to their similarly branded cars (Civic meets, Protegé meets), but to compare the colours of their cars--yellow car meets, red car meets, etc. That would be so cool. If you've ever seen a car meet, you know that the meeting cars and drivers can pretty well fill a parking lot, so can you just imagine if all the cars were the same colour? That would be hot. No matter what colour car I drove, I'd show up to the Yellow-car meets--yellow cars and their drivers are usually quite sexy...unless they drive yellow Mazda Protegé5s...those are SO done.

White
White is my favourite colour to wear in the summer--not only does it keep you cool, but it accentuates any bronzing you may have acquired in the sunshine. That, and white goes with anything. I don't think I could ever own enough white articles of clothing. The only downfall to white clothes is that they have to be washed separately from all your other clothes so therefore it may be a little while before you get to wear your favourite white shrit or pants again after they head down to the laundry room. My next planned purchase of white: that bikini from La Vie en Rose. Oh, and a sheer white cotton t-shirt from AE. And a pair of white sandals couldn't be bad. And a white skirt would be nice too...as well as...hehehe...

Blue
Blue skies mean good times. Blue skies also mean time to get outside and get active! Squiggly and I took advantage of the sunny yet cool weather this afternoon to strap on our matching rollerblades and matching wristguards (we swear all of our matching gear was purely coincidental) and went for a round of the neighbourhood on the blades while we chatted. Sure it was brief, but as he pointed out, we probably would've talked sooner or later for a bit on the phone today, so it might as well have been while we were doing something rather than just sitting inside. And just as an FYI, our matching wristguards are also blue. :)

Awww...

Mom and Dad went to a wedding last night. The parting gift that they received was a personalized CD of the newly-weds' favourite songs, with a picture of them on the inside cover. What I liked about it (besides the pretty flower design on the CD itself) was that picture of the happy couple. It wasn't the usual posed wedding shot of the two all decked out, nor was it them posed nicely smiling at the camera. It was a candid shot--obviously setup in a studio of some sort but still candid--of the groom giving his bride-to-be a piggy-back ride. All they picture really shows is theirs faces close together; he's looking back and smiling at her, while she's laughing and enjoying the backwards embrace. That's what love really should be: fun, happy, sometimes backwards, but never posed. It should also be forever faithful, just as they had chosen to name their CD compilation. As I was admiring the CD cover, my Mom told me their story as she had learned it that night:

Best friends since grade one, they grew up together in the Philippines over all those years. Some many years ago, his family got up moved to Canada, all the way on the opposite end of the world from her. They didn't see each other for years, and their lives seemingly suffered because of it. But they never forgot each other and after working so hard for so long, he saved up all the money he could and one day went back for her. Since then she moved to Canada to be with him and their lives returned to the happy state they once knew so long ago. They were indeed forever faithful.

Now if that doesn't bring a tear to your eye, what does? I one day dream (yes, this is going to be corny) that I will find the person that I can truly claim to complete me, just like they have.

The Method To The Madness

Rather than listening to upbeat music when I'm sad in an attempt to lighten my mood, I listen to sad and sappy songs; it's because the sad songs give me the sense that I'm not the only one who's down and out. Listening to them gives me the sense that someone out there understands what I'm going through.

I have driving days when I'm confused and lost. Short of mechanical failure, I have complete control of my destination no matter how much or little I think about it. I can go anywhere or no where. I can go fast or slow. I can listen to music or I can drive in silence. I need no one else to do this.

I like to watch sappy romance movies when I'm lonely because they give me hope that no matter how awful or alienated I may feel, there will one day come someone who will love me for me, and who I can be with for the rest of my life--together.

When I'm feeling depressed, it cheers me up if it's raining. It makes it feel like I'm not the only one crying or feeling grey or blue, and for a little while, it feels like the world is revolving around me.

I like to read other people's writing at all hours of the night because it feels like I'm not the only one who's still struggling to collect her thoughts.

I can never easily call it a night--I'm always afraid I'm going to miss something.

It's Days Like This

It's days like this that I don't want to go to work, look for a job, have any responsibilities. I just want to lie in the sun, cruise with the top down, and spend the day being a social butterfly. Sunshine rocks.

If I ever have a summer love affair, it'd better be like she says it is:

When you touched my hand
the sun got brighter then
trusting you I closed my eyes
and felt I was in...

It was the summertime
when we fell in love
It was the summertime
when heaven shined on us
It was the summertime
baby there is nothing like the summertime
    -- Beyonce, Summertime

Morny...Kind Of

Well would you look at that? The sun's coming up! *sigh* And I'm not even going to bed--I was there for a few hours, but I couldn't sleep--it's time for me to head to the airport to pick up my great-aunt from San Fran. Yay. Mom's coming with me, and I have a feeling that I'm going to be the one to drive. But that's okay, it's not like I have anything better to do at this time. I'm so okay with it, that I'm even going to buy her a coffee! I'll tell you about it later.

But Do I Have To?

After searching for and then applying to 5+ jobs online (I've actually lost count), I'm finally going to rip my contacts out of my eyes and go to bed. I was actually considering making myself a new necklace tonight that couldn't possibly resemble anyone's pubic hair or anal leakage this time, but there was this little voice in the back of my head that told me that I really needed to start looking for summer employment if I wanted to be able to afford to finish my studies and graduate next year. I think that voice was my mother's--she was mentioning something about doing the laundry and scrubbing the toilets too. We'll see how this applying business goes...

Jabbering Randomly For The Fourth Time

I am thoroughly addicted to the Kill Bill Vol. 2 Soundtrack. It's short--just over 45 minutes long--but I've kept it on repeat for the past few days and nights that I've owned it. Of course I have my two favourite tracks--"About Her" by Malcolm Mclaren and "Goodnight Moon" by Shivaree--that I could put on repeat by themselves--and I've done just that--but the whole album is so good too. Especially if you've seen the movie; you can just see the scenes everytime you hear the songs. Well, I can at least.

Because I showered and then went for a walk right afterwards with the sun and warm breeze, I am having a GREAT hair day today.

There's some construction going on in my neighbourhood; they're re-doing the water mains. The debris is actually quite scary to weave through on rollerblades as I discovered today. But the big thing is that they're turning off my water tomorrow (today) starting at 9am until 5pm, and as we know, I don't wake up until AFTER 9am which may pose a problem for me. So if you see me tomorrow (today) before 5pm, you might NOT want to do that...who knows if I'll have brushed my teeth by then?

Saw Starsky and Hutch tonight--"Do it! Just do it!"

I posted a while ago about my love for lightning and thunder storms--especially the ones that take place at night. I think nature learned about this fact about me, and has decided to tease me. Last night I was at Tim's with Tuna and I kept catching glimpses of lightning outside, but there was no accompanying thunder. I couldn't actually be sure that there was any lightning either, because Tuna insisted that he saw nothing. And then as I mentioned earlier, I heard thunder outside, yet there was neither any lightning or rain for that matter...there wasn't even anymore thunder after those first 4 times. Finally, last week Thursday, I was on my way to tutoring when I saw this HUGE bolt of lightning tear down the sky and touchdown somewhere behind me (I witnessed this in the reflection of the car's rear window in front of me), which was followed by a deafening clap of thunder so loud I jumped and let out a bit of a yelp, even though I was expecting it (this clap was so loud, Hun-Gee, way out west somewhere on the 401 heard it). But after that one and only show of force, there was nothing. I want a show! Why else would I have such a big window in my room? It sure isn't for people to look IN through, I'll tell you that.

I swear I am going to start working out...tomorrow.

Dress shopping tomorrow, dinner on Wednesday, volleyball fees on Thursday, clubbing on Friday. Saving money? What is this? Job search needs to start last month.

I know that soon smokers will be restricted to smoking outdoors, but then what will us non-smokers do for a breath of fresh air? Will we be forced to have to step indoors to avoid the smoky atmosphere? And you know what else? Any one who does go outside to enjoy the outdoors, looks out of place if they're not smoking. At the last tournament that I played in, the gym was boiling hot and I decided to step outside to cool off, but because I was neither searching for reception nor wielding a cigarette in either of my hands, I was the one that looked out of place. Thank goodness non-smoking Jeffy appeared to keep me company, but other than that, I would have just headed back inside for fear of being looked at funny for my healthy habit.

I have a wedding to go to (hence the dress shopping) the last weekend of this month--the same weekend that I've been asked to play in two volleyball tournaments. As much as would love to socialize with all of these relatives that are way older than me and whom I barely know, I WANT TO PLAY BEACH VOLLEYBALL!!! Oh, and go to Queen's with Tuna... But yeah, I WANT HALF-NAKED MEN WITH HARD BODIES GLISTENING WITH SWEAT IN THE SUN TO PLAY VOLLEYBALL!!! :)

Shaky called me a blog whore on MSN last night. I am not. As much as I'd like them to, nobody's paying me to blog. Any enjoyment I provide is unfortunately free.

Just Got Some

I just got some...sun that is. :) This morning afternoon when I woke up, the sun was POURING into my room. I swear, I nearly drowned in it, which is why I hopped out of bed and headed outside to get some sun on this pasty white body of mine (mmm, yum, eh?). Anyway, figures that as soon as I come inside to find my blades, the sky clouds over and I hear sounds of thunder in the not-so-distant distance. And so here I am writing this, but according to KC, my weather reporter up north who first reported the rain, the sky's cleared up, and since I haven't seen any rain down here, I'm going to chance it and head out for a rollerblade. WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!! SUMMER'S HERE!!! See you on the beach!

Quote of the Moment:
"Marriage is but slavery made to appear civilized."
    -- Albert Einstein
...

I can't say that I share this exact outlook on marriage, but you know sometimes it sure can seem true for some.

Song of the Moment: "About Her" - Malcolm McLaren, from the Kill Bill Vol. 2 Soundtrack

My man’s
Got a heart
Like a rock
Cast in the sea

Well no one told me about her
The way she lies
Well no one told me about her
How many people cried

My man’s
Got a heart
Like a rock
Cast in the sea

Well no one told me about her
The way she lies
Well no one told me about her
How many people cried

But it’s too late to say you’re sorry
How would I know?
Why should I care?
Please don’t bother trying to find her
She’s not there

My man’s
Got a heart
Like a rock
Cast in the sea
Cast in the sea

Well no one told me about her
Well no one told me about her
How many people cried

But it’s too late to say you’re sorry
How would I know?
Why should I care?
Please don’t bother trying to find her
She’s not there
She’s not there

'Cause You're There For Me Too

Well, I guess they're not anymore. *wails* No!!! Even though I bet the re-runs will never go off the air, and even though I already have full copies of seasons 1, 2, and 10, I'm still saddened by the fact that there will be no more new episodes of F·R·I·E·N·D·S for me to watch, compare my life to, memorize, and then quote from when having a day with Boo, Roo, Jean, Jeffy, or Brodder.

On Thursday, I had to tutor my kids and consequently had to miss out on watching the finale with the other 51 million home viewers and instead had to settle for taping it and then ignoring everyone who called me in case they happened to slip and reveal any of it to me. The only phone call that I accepted after the airing was over was from Boo (cuz I knew she knew better than to ruin it for me) and all she sedatedly said was "I'm a little sad, that's all."

Anyway, I went and hung out with Bar and his taped version of "The One Before the Last One" and of course the finale. Before we actually got the tape though, we watched the interview of the cast of F·R·I·E·N·D·S on Jay Leno--for which they recreated the actual set of Central Perk--and then right after we watched the first half of Conan O'Brien--because he had Brad and Janet as his guests (how could we resist?). All I have to say about the Jay Leno interview is that I LOVE the show's outtakes and that I (and Boo) could watch a whole DVD comprised solely of Monica's Fat Dance.

After all this prelim we finally reached the tape which I watched with a box of tissue right by my side. To be honest, I could see all of what happened coming from three episodes away, but that didn't make it any easier or less momentous for me. Since I was watching with company, I tried to hold in my tears, but my quiet attempts were to no avail; I wept like a baby, and sounded like a strangled goat. *sigh* The line that got me the most:
    "I got off the plane."
(I'm welling up just thinking about it...)

And then it was all over. It took me a while to stop weeping and let it sink in, but when it did, I was left with the same feeling that Boo had been left with five hours earlier: "I'm a little sad, that's all," but by then, I realized that that was an understatement. Call me girly, or sentimental, or sappy, but it really felt like there was suddenly a void in my life that was never going to be filled again. COME BACK F·R·I·E·N·D·S!!! I hope everyone by now has witnessed the farewell and the finale of what could possibly be the greatest show of my lifetime. If not, I have both a copy on VHS and on my computer--feel free to ask. :)

A Kiss

We were sitting next to each other--closely. I turned to look up at him and caught him staring at me, but unlike most people caught staring, he didn't look away. Instead, he held my gaze so that suddenly it was I who couldn't look away. The next thing I knew, he leaned in and kissed me, and though I was scared at first, I kissed him back. I knew we shouldn't have kissed, and despite my mind's protests, we kissed more and more, holding each other closely, entangling our arms until I feared we would never let go.
...

Sound hot? It was. Too bad it was only a dream.

Oh Mother

My mother has tension in her jaw and consequently in her cheek muscles. So, in her brilliant plan to relieve this tension, she's plastered the Dr. HO electric masseur to her face and is letting it work its twitchy magic, much to the rest of the family's amusement. Seriously, I can't even look at her right now without bursting out into hysterical laughter, and as we all know, my laughter is anything but quiet. But I can't help it, she looks absolutely ridiculous! Unfortunately, she won't allow me to take a picture of any of her involuntary expressions, and as this IS mother's day weekend, I feel inclined to obey, but really, it's hilarious. Just imagine a pervvy old man slyly winking at you yet at the same time sneering with only one side of his face and then multiply the simultaneous sneer and wink by about 100times/minute. My mother is neither pervvy nor an old man, but that's the best description I can get. Oh man...I think my gut is going to burst. :)

Gone To Bead

No, the world is not going to end; I did not go to bed early last night, despite my lack of posts. I was busy doing other things as I was in a crafty sort of mood. And I'd say my efforts were well rewarded, don't you think?

   

*Huge Sigh Of Relief*

I just checked my mark online for the course in which I had that essay worth 70% of my final mark; the other 30% of the mark was participation and as I managed to miss about half of all the classes, this essay mark was going to be the deciding factor of whether I passed or not. Up until now, I had never failed a course, and up until now, I had never encountered a course so weighted on a single assignment.

As I typed in my student number and password, my stomach started to toss and turn on itself. As I waited for my transcript page to load up, my palms started to sweat. And as I slowly scrolled down the page to find my mark, I swear my eye twitched. Finally, I saw my mark--I passed!!! Thank goodness, and it wasn't even an eking by kind of mark, I actually did fairly well overall (though I still don't feel the need to actually POST my mark ;) ). Whew, thank goodness. So far, so good, and if this keeps up, my academic status will continue to read: "In good standing." Whoo-hoo!
...

And now comes the decision of whether to actually bother going to sleep now at all. Brodder already came in to my room about twenty minutes ago to ask me "is there really any point?" But in the end, he decided to force himself to catch what sleep he could--he IS still in school, afterall. I, on the other hand, am not still in school...I'm sure I can still find stuff online to read and if not, then I can start providing people with uncalled for wake-up calls. :)

Song of the Moment: "The Sky Is Broken" - Moby

see the storm is broken
in the middle of the night
nothing left here for me
it's washed away
the rain pushes
the buildings aside
the sky turns black
the sky
wash it far
push it out to sea
there's nothing left here
for me
i watch it lift up to the sky
i watch it crush me
and then i die

speak to me baby
in the middle of the night
pull your mouth
close to mine
i can see the wind coming down
like black night
so speak to me
like the winds outside
it's broken up, pushing us
hear the rain fall
see the wind come to my eyes
see the storm broken
now nothing
speak to me baby
in the middle of the night
speak to me
hold your mouth to mine
'cause the sky is breaking
it's deeper than love
i know the way you feel
like the rains outside
speak to me
...

I first heard this song in an X-Files episode while Sculley was walking down a long hallway wielding her gun and looking for bad guys. It became an instant favourite, and remains, in my opinion, the ultimate song to listen to while watching it rain. It is also, in my opinion, the ultimate song to hear while being seduced in the dark, but that's another story.

More Directions To My Place

Lost again? I should be offended if you keep forgetting how to get here. But I'm a nice person. Here are more of those somewhat strange searches via which strangers are finding me:

MSN
    "boobie's place"
    "the joy fuck club"

Yahoo
    "cool things to write about"
    "tresse de cheveux" (does anyone besides Señorita know what this is?)

At least this time I didn't get any hits by those looking for porn...

Marriage Is A Dream?

I just woke up from a dream. I dreamt that I was getting married. The guests were already gathered and seated in the pews of the warehouse/studio style church room somewhere in downtown New York; my guests to my left, my groom's guests to my right. It was a winter wedding as we'd already had our pictures taken outside with the snow falling around us before we headed off to Montreal for the second reception--his or mine, I don't know. The minister signalled that we were ready to begin and so I knelt down at the back of the room so that my little flowergirl dressed in pink could help me bring my veil over my head to cover my face before I began my walk down the aisle, accompanied by my eighty-four going on eighty-five year old father. As a last item before my flowing procession started, the minister asked the audience if anyone had a story to share about being stood up on their wedding day, and everyone's hand went up.

What began as my own beautiful wedding ceremony, turned into a pseudo-"I was left at the altar" support group. It seemed that everyone had experienced being jilted at the altar at least once, if not more. There were so many stories to be heard that my poor father had to take a seat after standing so long. One man's fiancée apparently left him because she couldn't tell whether he had had his teeth bleached, of whether they were actually that white. The minister himself had been left twice at the altar and took the time to address each case in their turn.

So what ever became of the glowing bride and her wedding party? My flowergirl had left to frolick amongst the pews, and my dear old father fell asleep in his seat, his chin resting on his hands which were neatly folded over the handle of his cane. And I, I patiently stood at my end of the red carpet which had been specially laid down for me to walk upon that day, waiting to walk down that aisle to exchange vows with my never-identified groom. And yet as I waited and listened to story after story of hearts being broken, I never stopped being the happy, glowing bride, thrilled at the fact that I was getting so much use out of my dress and veil. It was my wedding day and nothing (short of being left at the altar) was going to ruin it for me.

Photographic Proofs

Proof that I am nocturnal:

Proof that the world does not wait for you:

Proof of rain:

Proof of fear:

Proof of the road home: