Internally uninitiated

I have a summer intern as my cubicle-mate. He’s excruciatingly young and the fact that he’s got SUCH a baby face look to him doesn’t help at all. While I have to give him credit for knowing his business stuff (and hip-hop/rap history, juxtaposedly enough) his lack of knowledge elsewhere just kills me, reminding me just how old mature I am, and how sheltered he is.

City Vocabulary
Having been raised and reared in the distant suburb of Vaughan, the Intern is not very familiar with Toronto streets, places, or pronunciations.

   “Hey, Intern, where’s the Frank Ocean concert tonight?”
   “Oh yeah, I’m so pumped! It’s at the ‘Cool Hoss.’”
   “The what…where? You mean at ‘Kool Haus.’”
   “No, it says it’s…”
   “Trust me, Intern, it’s ‘Kool Haus.’”
   “Oh.”

Later that same day, he also learned that he was meeting his friends on “Queen’s Quay,” not “Queen’s Kway.”

Life Vocabulary
Then, on Friday after the sign-up sheet was posted, Intern finally learned what those regular family gatherings for dinners were called by others.

   “So, Intern, when your family gets together and everyone brings a dish to share, what do you call that?”
   “A family dinner. I’ve never called it a ‘pot-luck’ before today.”

Poor boy.

Keyboard etymology
Finally, while making review comments on a document regarding formatting, Intern kept making notes to “delete the extra enters.” A few more comments later, I realized he meant to delete the extra “hard returns.” I called over the cube wall to verify with him that that was what he meant. He called back,

   “What’s a hard return?”

Oh man.